Tales of a rape victim.



    Today I sat on my chair, the brown one, with metal legs that directly faces the window and lays adjacent to the waste bin, slowly she opens the window, ah it's the leftover droplets of the rain!  she says, something holds her there, she is stuck there looking out the window and then the thoughts start coming, I can't change the wrong that has been done to me, I can't go back in time
and decide to stay home
listening to the songs that played on the radio that warm evening, unconsciously fat tears starts rolling down her cheeks.

      what if I had worn the ugly long gown, the one that swallowed me up and left a whole lot to imagination? Would he have noticed me? Would he have held a gun to my head as he forced me into his car? He took me to a dark, cold house as cold as he's intentions and commanded me to strip, no one can save you now poor thing, he said.
         
With shaking hand she removed her clothes, the first button, second button, the third, well there was no third,  the button had popped the other night, she mentally noted down, (Note to self: fix the prodigal button when you get back) what am I doing, here I am thinking of a button, will I ever leave this house alive? What happens next?  I closed my eyes, shut it tight, when he touched me, it hurt, his tongue did unspeakable things, even as his breath came in gasps night after night as he violated my dirty wounded body, all I saw was darkness, he did it again and again and again until I couldn't take it anymore. This weak thing, this object that brought warmth to your loins had become an animal that will viciously rip you apart.


     I don't know how I did it, till this very day, the object I reached for, or how I lay hands on it, it all happened in a moment, I wasn't thinking, bang, bang, bang, there was blood and screams. Sometimes, I wonder who that voice crying out in agony belonged to, all I knew was I ran, I couldn’t see, where am I? What date is it? Who is the current president?
   
        Nadia honey step away from the window, Aliyah’s voice brought me back to Lagos, Nigeria current date: 12/05/2016 all I will ever have are fears, countless scars branded into my memory, to hunt me day and night, all because someone decided to tap into the bestial nature of man.

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