THE UGLY TRUTH: automemography..

   It all started with a harmless intention that happened during a sleepover with brothers,

we were playing a game of tag, i ran into the laundry room hoping to hide panting from all the excitement, i sat down in warmth, only to hear whispers of  "i will protect you and hot breath on my skin" this moment was cut short by the entry of the other brother who ended the game *SIGHS* i really dont know why i remembered this but i really can't stop now without completing the story


      you know it would have been dope to end it there but no not me, i and my much older friend (the brother from earlier) who kept his word on protecting me even till high school you see i had  a crush on him since forever, sat under a tree, a tree not too far from my classroom during recess,and that was when the questions started:

    who are you going to marry when you grow up?, i smiled and said i didnt know as i was way too little then, he then told me that i couldn't marry a dog or a goat we laughed as i was saved by the bell.            
       Little did i know that i and my friend were going to come together only to part ways painfully later later in life, i always felt like he had a hold on me but not greater than the hold i had on him and so i wasnt surprised when we ended up dating years later we ended up dating, i was teased by my friends and we had a code name for him "FACEBOOK", (now looking back guys that name kinda suck what motivated us lol), i had peace and happiness and those were the days when my smile was full and true, he was caring, sweet, apologised sometimes when i was at fault, i told him to do silly things like tell me 10 reasons why he loved me, we had our fights yes, 70 percent of the time, it was over his brother who he always accused me of cheating on him with, maybe just maybe he was too scared of letting me go or was it obsession or attachment i felt, i dont know, all i knew was i was in love with a musician who was going to hit it big (maybe this also contributed to the buildup of doubt expanding in my heart, was he going to want me later when the sleepless nights began for him?, when he grew famous, when he starts missing my calls and put me on hold because one producer somewhere wants a business dinner or lunch, or maybe he is going to call me or send me a text if he ever gets to read this).

            There was this day when i and my best friend spent the whole day talking, i mean the whole day, i guess that was when it started, i was to meet him at a spot, i wished my best friend a good night and went to see my boyfriend, after spending some few munities with him my best friend walked past us with a straight face, he didnt even glance my way but i knew he had seen us, it was no secret they didnt like each other, i was torn between running after my best friend or staying with my boyfriend, why i decided to run after my best friend i still dont know till this very day, but that opened my eyes to the fact that i as in love with someone else all along.

         Some days later on a cold night, i asked my boyfriend if he remembered the question he had asked me under the big tree, my beloveth couldnt remember and i couldnt help but think IS THIS ALL A FIGMENT OF MY IMAGINATION?, did i create this fairy tale in my head because the reality of life was so cold for me to grasp, i guess i will never know, you see my life has never been black or white it has always been in a particular shade of GREY the light kind. Just live in the moment and let tomorrow take care of itself.

I broke up with him some weeks later, and in the arms of yet another i thought i had found solace, a solace that destroyed me till this very day...

    hey guys, keep up with this story ugly truth part 2 coming out on friday...